| 2008-12-10 |
Busting the Myths of Online Dating |
Like many new technologies (well, 'new' since the past 20 years!), personal single's websites have a lot of misconceptions following them around. We'd like to address some of them here.
This might not change your mind about the online single's life, but at least it gets some counter-arguments out there that need to be aired.
Myth #1. Online dating is for people who can't get a date in 'the real world'.
There's no way you could justify saying this for website dating, without also applying it to personals ads in the daily paper, telephone party-line services, single's social clubs, and single's bars. The fact is, we can decide to be pessimistic about every possible way to meet new people and then sit at home sour and alone, or we can decide that it's worth a shot. With a free dating site, you have nothing to lose. And, this being the 21st century, you almost can't find somebody who's never at least tried online dating; so that should tell you that somebody worth seeing is out there right now.
Myth #2. You can't develop chemistry online.
The Internet is founded on the idea of fast, efficient communication. Sure, in person you can read body language, and on the phone you can hear their voice. Outside of that, there's really no difference! Plus, a website can present more information quickly, and email and text messages can show a side of people that doesn't come out in speaking. If people couldn't develop bonds online, we'd like to know where all those cliques come from.
Myth #3. Nobody will date you if you're not a 'Perfect 10'.
Nothing could be farther from the truth. More of us look average than anything else. Online dating age ranges run from 18-year-olds to 70-year-olds and older, of all sexes, preferences, lifestyles, shapes, and sizes. For that matter, some of us, as a matter of personal taste, wouldn't want somebody for whom physical appearance is the first priority, because that's a pretty shallow way to be, anyway.
Myth #4. It's all casual flirting.
It is true that there are some social networks geared more towards finding a warm bed for the night than a lasting relationship, but that's the minority, not the majority. Check out the profiles on a single's website, and you'll see that most people are at least looking for a long-term relationship, perhaps even The One. Still others are looking for online-only contact, whether that's penpals or webcam buddies. There's nothing wrong with that, either - it's quite fun! Human relationships come in many varieties, and you'd be doing yourself a favor by coming to them with an open mind.
Myth #5. You won't make actual contact.
The only thing that stops you is if you give up. Unless a person specifically says in their profile that they don't want a real-life meeting, there really is a live person on the other end of that Internet connection who wants to meet somebody just as badly as you do. Try it yourself with a few social networks - you can join online communities which are not for dating and join a local 'meet-up', where you get to finally see what 'Manga_Fan123' looks like in person. They're there, alright. You just have to be prepared to make that jump from virtual world to real - do remember that you, too, will need to pry yourself away from the computer screen long enough to greet a warm human face!
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